Denise (glimmeringhope) wrote in uc_help,

Intro and Questions

Hi there. I'm new to this community. My name is Denise. I've been married to DH for almost 4 years and we have a 2 year old little girl. I am currently 15 weeks pregnant with our 2nd. We are not having an unassisted pregnancy as I had three miscarriage between July 06 and Feb of this year. Therefore, we decided to see a midwife for our prenatal care, especially during the first trimester. I feel comfortable continuing prenatal care now.

Originally we wanted a homebirth. Some things have happened financially and that's not possible with a midwife. There is only one legal midwife close to us (I had a fast first unmedicated labor, so we don't even want to risk paying the midwife who's 2.5-3 hrs away to come to the birth if there's a good chance she won't even make it!) and we just can't afford the out of pocket cost right now. She doesn't accept insurance, either. So our options are delivering at the hospital we're seeing the midwives at (where I had dd with the high risk OBs there) or go UC at home. I just do not feel that there's any way I will be able to get what I want during the birth at the hospital without fighting tooth and nail every step of the way. And even though I have people willing to do the fighting for me, I don't want the hostile energy around me when I'm laboring!

So...I am looking more and more towards UC. But...those of you who have BTDT- how did you convince your partner's? I want Dh to be on board, as I am pretty needy when pregnant, and if I'm the same way in labor, I want to have him supporting me. I did want to be alone during labor with dd, but every experience is different so I'm not counting on feeling the same I did laboring with her. I have a feeling if I present him with reasonable information and can intelligently answer his questions and concerns, he'll be fine with it. But any tips or ideas on how to present the information would be appreciated! Or just stories of "well, this is what I did..."

Also...what did you have in your birth kit that you found absolutely necessary? What were the things that were nice to have? And what did you not have but looking back would definitely plan to have for next time?

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